I can’t promise not to hurt you again because I don’t know you perfectly. I can definitely promise that the likelihood of it happening would decline over time as we get to know each other better. This is exactly why I said “I regret declaring this a relationship so early” - we’d be walking too close before we know each other well enough to properly do it. If I didn’t declare myself as your boyfriend we wouldn’t be having this conversation today and your feelings wouldn’t have been exposed enough to me to be hurt. If it somehow still isn’t clear - this doesn’t mean that I don’t like you enough - if anything it means the exact opposite - it means I like you enough to want to step into your life at the right pace so I’m taking as little risk as possible, but you are not making it easy.

I’m very aware that you are putting more effort into our relationship than I am - it’s a balanced that I’ve desperately been trying to restore. But please know that while I may not always voice my efforts, I’m already doing things for you - most notably declaring myself as your boyfriend much earlier than I was willing to because it seemed extremely important to you at the time even though I wasn’t entirely sure why. Meeting Anïya was another example, but that time it was motivated by positive energy - I saw an opportunity to go far outside of my comfort zone to do something you’d appreciate.

I’m enjoying being your boyfriend very much and appreciate what you do for me. I appreciate you making travel arrangements days prior and spending hours traveling just for a little bit of time with me, and I appreciate waking up to your warm texts as the first thing I see literally every morning, which is why I always look for chances to return something to you. 

However you seem to be taking some of what I do for granted when in reality I’ve been pushing myself to the limit.

Meeting your parents at this stage would be beyond my boundaries.

^This is what I meant when I said “I regret declaring this a relationship so early”. It was not a comment on your value, it was a comment on my ability. What you don’t seem to realize is that while declaring the relationship on week 3 may have seemed slow to you, it’s already pretty fast for me. I did it (and perhaps pretty delicately) because I wanted to protect your feelings and make your day. Thinking back it was probably not the best idea to use something as serious as that as a way to make you happy.

I would much rather have us just be “two people seeing each other” - certainly no parents and preferably no friends either, just a private emotional space for two. However it became real clear real early that that was not what you were looking for. But I was willing to compromise because I thought a relationship with you would still be valuable despite that, and it was. 

Even though it may not have been by best move, I had no reason to regret what I did until I realized that because I’ve been known as your boyfriend for a while, everyone’s pressuring you to introduce me.

I hope I have made it abundantly clear that my short but poorly-chosen string of words were not a negative comment on your value to me. I am again sorry that I made it sound like something that would understandably have hurt you deeply. 

I’m sorry.